Worried about Nuts

I'm stuck. I don't know what to do next. And I don't know who to consult. The only person who understands is ... flitting away. My fault, I guess?

I'm just worried about losing it. I'm worried I'm taking it too far and I don't know where and how to stop. And I'm worried it does not work out.


My sis is flying off to somewhere within the next two weeks. There'll be that awkward, dramatic send-off moment again, at the airport, freeflow of tears, unexpected breakdowns, the impatient relatives, and the odd silent one trying to stay strong. That silent one is usually me. The impatient one will be my mum, hurrying to get her onto the plane. The breaking down one will be my dad.

I would have thought the roles would be REALLY different if I hadn't gone through that before. Usually dads are the strong ones, the mums crying and the siblings smirking at their newfound freedom.

It's funny, cuz my sis just came back from London in early April and now she's off to somewhere new. I'm gonna miss those crazy laughs we had. And yes, the shopping. Shopping with sisters is so much more exhilarating than with your conventional, annoyingly frugal, your-budget-is-RM20-tops Asian parents.

I'm not complaining. And I'm not even panicking. SPM is four months away, and I haven't started any shit. I dreamt a few nights ago that I left my Mod Maths paper blank. Eeeks!


My dad hasn't been feeling good. 2009 is not his year at all. It's one sickness after another. Last night's event was atrociously frightening. And both my mum and my sis are going off, leaving me with my dad.

I can't even take care of myself! Looks like there'll be loads of Domino's, Pizza Hut, McD, KFC, Maggi Mee, Gardenia and Chuan Lee for the two of us in the few weeks that they're away. Just the two of us....

Life is fun.

Oh God I'm so whiny.

PS: Why do Assunta events ALWAYS HAVE TO CLASH with Samad events? I so badly want to go for their Installation... then there's the silly Karnival Samad 2009. Oh, and Cheer 2009.